Manchester...

I'm typing this blog from a hotel suite near the airport in Manchester, NH.  What the hell am I doing here? Don't worry about it. I'm getting to it. I just first want to make reference to that bit about me being the time management ninja. I time managed. I ninja-ed. And all went according to plan.

The gig with Ryan and Jordana went swimmingly and was super fun to boot (there's some video on FB). And, already in awe at how the previous weekend timed out, in that I was able to use the disruption of the blizzard to our rehearsals as a way to push forward on the News Literacy Project's music, I was supremely awed at how it just happened that the night of the gig, I finally got word from NLP that I could push ahead on the project. See, I had been waiting to hear some direction from them, and frustrating though that can be sometimes, it was quite a boon in that I could meanwhile focus all my energy on rocking the F@$% out at the show and, as soon as it was done, shift my energy to writing the music for those educational videos.  The timing of everything was impeccable, in that nothing was simultaneous. It was all sequential and I could devote all my energy to one project at a time.

Fast forward: My boss had previously mentioned to me the possibility of doing some field work as I had shown some interest in getting out there and trying something new. He did, in fact, also mention that these things can get sprung upon him at a moment's notice and, bada-bing, bada-boom. But I was surprised that something came up so quickly.  They needed an audio tech out in the field for the coverage of the New Hampshire primaries and my boss offered it to me.  After all, I can audio. I can tech. So I said hell to the F@#$ yes! Then, the day before I was finally going to get time to finish the NLP music, I get a call that, rather than go out on the 5th of February, they wanted me there as soon as the 1st and still until the 10th.  !!!

The girlfriend didn't like it but I obliged because when else? (Incidentally, this is something my boss says to me and my colleagues a lot...when else?)  So, I had two full days to wrap up work on the music for NLP and pack my bags before I had to catch a plane to Manchester. And I knocked it out. Just under the wire. I didn't even have my flight booked until two days before it was supposed to happen and I had to borrow a bass guitar from a friend to get everything done.  Sidebar: I'm buying a bass guitar soon.

What a freaking whirlwind this year has been already, am I right? Sheesh! But I am loving it. You know how much I love travel and adventure.  Day 1 was pretty intense already.  I flew in yesterday and went straight to the anchor location for set up and then had dinner with one of the producers and the photojournalist. Then I had to go check into my hotel (a suite with a full freakin' kitchen!) because I had to be up at 3:30am for a 4am call time. Our first hit was at 5:30am.

They had us set up inside a cafe for New Day (CNN's morning show) and we had to basically turn that place into a news studio, complete with lighting, in the space of a few hours the night before. But CNN has an entourage of professionals that are on this shit and everything looked great. Meanwhile, I was thrown in on an audio board I'd never seen before with a set up I heard described to me in an email I read while waiting in La Guardia International Airport for three hours because airlines still can't get their shit together. So, that was quite fun. Once I got my feet wet, and twiddled some knobs, I started to feel much more comfortable...but then comes the shit storm of audio issues that you get when you have too many hands stirring the pot. Ultimately, we got everything on the air and I got the hang of what I was doing.  And I remembered that, on some level, I enjoy this work.

After we took everything down though, I started to realize that I had no idea where I was going next. And I think that is going to characterize the rest of this week. Last minute assignments. This is why they gave me a rental car. Tomorrow, I finally found out, I'll be heading to Derry, NH where there will be a town hall style Q&A session with both Hillary Clinton and Bernie Sanders (one candidate after the other) and I'll be running the audio. Which means I will probably be pinning a lapel mic on both candidates.

It's amazing what can happen in the space of a week. More to come!

Obligatory end of year post...

Approximately 12 hours ago I was riding in the dark and the pouring rain to Indianapolis International Airport.  Yeah, that was about 5am.  The cheap flights are always early in the morning. But it's a mark of how well I'm doing that I'm not only traveling to see my girlfriend's family but also my own in a few weeks.  Yes, I may still be buying the cheaper plane tickets but I'm traveling twice for the holidays.  CNN has been treating me well over the last few months and money's not as tight as it was before I started working all three jobs two years ago.  Finally.  I'm really enjoying getting to work there not just for the view out my window that I can't stop posting pics of.  The people I work directly with are great, my boss is great and I'm meeting incredible people in all the other departments and learning that I can find opportunities to expand my duties there.  Sometimes they even find me.

I'm not sure I can post the last voice over I did for them but I swear I'll alert you...no wait! Here it is!
So, that was a lot of fun to do.  The job seems to get better every day and then some opportunity like that jumps in my lap.  A few weeks ago I was looking up new music for GPS with Fareed Zakaria using Turner's massive music library at my boss' request.  And I even helped translate an interview in French with one of the survivors of the attack on the Bataclan club in Paris for Anderson Cooper's show.  Apparently, I've effectively used all of my degrees at my job now.  What?!

Anyway, don't think this means I'm giving up on being a composer. Oh god, never. One of the things I can count on is one of the handful of directors I've worked with that have varying degrees of prolificness eventually calling me for a job.  I got a VO and a separate music job from the same guy last week just before leaving for my short vacation in Indy.

I will say that things were a little touch and go for a minute there as I was focusing on CNN and not really devoting time to it. Also my laptop was on the fritz.  All that is fixed now thanks to my friend with whom I had been trying to write music with.  He and his wife and I jammed together a bunch in the summer time but when their respective semesters started school just kept getting in the way for them.  Turns out though, he's a whiz with Macbooks and I happened to need a new hard drive installed and a memory upgrade.  And thanks to all those slips and disasters I had in the past, my diligence when it comes to backing up my data paid off.  I was back up and running within a few days or so once we did the install together.

And just in time too.  Mohammad came through with a quick music gig, a track for his directing reel and I busted it out in record time cuz that's how I do.  The VO for the sizzle reel (separate job) was, inevitably, a mock movie trailer voice so you can imagine I had fun with that one.  One thing that I really want to do next year is chase things like that down instead of this sitting around and waiting for them to come to me. Obviously, that's going to require a different approach and perhaps some outside encouragement.

So, what else happened during this fine year of 2015? Well besides a lot of traveling and a new job, I now have a partner in crime who just moved in with me back in November. And that's been real nice. No more roommates, I says.  And guess what else? We get to travel together, beyond going to see relatives.  Next stop is Guadeloupe this March.  A French speaking Caribbean nation...with an active volcano. Sounds right up my alley.

Another thing, I plan on doing next year is writing more in the blog...which requires having more things to write about, so look out for that.

Wanderlust

It sometimes takes me a while these days to unpack my experience of a trip, the impressions, the things that changed me, and articulate it into a story.  And this blog, while it's been a chronicle of my time in New York City, has also allowed me an outlet for these kinds of stories.  The kinds of stories I've discovered that I love telling.  And perhaps that's why I started to travel again.  I've always had a bit of wanderlust ever since my parents dragged me (I say that lovingly...I was not really dragged) on a trip around the country at the tender yet excitable age of 8.  I've thirsted since to see more of the world.  When asked what I wanted for a graduation present from high school, without hesitation, I said a trip to Paris.

Fast forward to this year.  The fact that there is a festival called Wanderlust seemed like a no brainer. Yet, it was a friend who suggested we go and, therefore, not my idea.  A few months ago in the course of a twenty minute phone conversation, the plan was hatched.  This July, Snowmass Village, Colorado was hosting the festival.  I hadn't been to Colorado since that fateful trip as a wide-eyed eight year old. We rode the Durango to Silverton railroad and I gazed at canyons and roaring rivers out the window of the train, noticing only at the end of the trip how much soot had accumulated on my face.  In Silverton, I gestured toward snowy mountains and begged my parents to hike up so we could see snow in June.  My siblings laughed at my inability to judge distance. Here's me with the brakeman's hat on:

When my friend told me that the Wanderlust festival was in Colorado, I bit almost immediately.  A yoga festival? In Colorado? Of course!

So we began planning, reserved a rental car, and agreed on an AirBnb in Basalt, a town about thirty minutes away, to save money.  And I began getting excited about things like Acro Yoga and Stand-up Paddleboard Yoga (the classes were all full by the time we had bought out tickets unfortunately so I didn't get to try it) and Slackline Yoga, farm to table dinners, hiking and meditation in nature, as well as the fact that there would be music every night.  Outdoor music.  And then they sent out an email after we bought our tickets saying that freakin' Moby was headlining the festival!

Here's an album of photos from the festival.  There's so much to say about the festival so I'll just talk highlights and forego the blow by blow.  Probably one of the most inspiring moments of the festival for me was the meditation hike with Häana, a violinist who came to the festival as one of the performers. Her music was really awesome. She actually almost carpooled with us from Denver International Airport but her flight kept getting delayed. I had researched her when she answered my post on the Wanderlust Facebook page offering rides from Denver to other festival goers.

On the second day of the festival I got a chance to hear her play a full electronic set at one of the indoor meditation classes. That alone was amazing and really freaking cool.  But on this hike, she brought an old vintage violin that had this amazingly beautiful resonance.  We hiked a little ways into the Aspen groves where she led a brief meditation and while we continued to sit in the tall grasses, she improvised for about twenty minutes in a Norwegian influenced style. As the music swelled, the breeze tickled us and a small thunderstorm rolled in.  Just being out there in the open air, feeling the breeze, and hearing the haunting sounds of that violin.  It was so beautiful.  There are a couple good pics from the hike in that album as well as a video I took after hanging back on the hike down (you can hear the thunder in the background!)

Another spectacular moment was trying out Acro yoga for the first time and getting up in a handstand while balancing on another person's knees while they laid on the ground.  All the pics in that album where you see the dome tents set up is where we had all of those classes.  There were some other types of specialized yoga that happened there, but that I didn't get to try, like AiREAL yoga which has you balancing in fabric hammocks, doing moves meant to decompress the spine and strengthen your core.  There was also Slackline yoga which is essentially doing yoga on a tight rope.  The guy who did carpool with us from the airport was huge into this and my friend who came with me tried a few classes (she was also into the Hula classes which were a big thing).  My only attempt at slack-lining was after having a few drinks when it was late at night and dark out.  It did not go well.

Other highlights were of course all of the concerts, including Moby and the Wanderlust Spectacular, a full show of acrobatics and dancing that had my jaw dropping the whole time.  Then there was hanging out in Aspen on my last night with a local I'd met on my first night there and then having her show us around her town of Carbondale on our final day after the festival had ended.  Our AirBnb host even joined us at a local distillery there called Marble Distillery and then we all had dinner at a place called Town.  I tried rabbit tacos and they were excellent!

I gotta tell you, on a side note, the elevation up there did not kill me but it was certainly a bit harder to walk uphill while simultaneously making conversation with the new friends I was making.  And it took far fewer flights of stairs than normal for me to be winded.  But that was all okay because I've heard what altitude sickness can be like and I would much prefer just having a little difficulty breathing to that any day.

Anyway, now that I'm back, and I've made friends out there, I plan on going back in September and hiking one of the 14ers.  Because lately, I've been obsessed with tall mountains and the like.  See my previous trip to Nicaragua in February.  And I'm not worried about the elevation gain because I know I'll probably acclimate in the first few days and the peak my friend has recommended only has like a 4,200 ft. elevation gain.  Concepción was 5,200 ft. tall and I hiked that one from the bottom in 4 1/2 hours.

And before any of this I was planning on going to Peru to hike Huayna Picchu, the peak next to the Machu Picchu ruins.  But that trip may have to wait because my girlfriend and I are talking fairly seriously about hitting up Dominica in the Caribbean, an island I zeroed in on and then was sold on the moment I realized that it boasts one of the tallest mountain peaks in the Caribbean Islands.  Morne Diablotins at 4,700 ft.  So, there will be more stories of surmounting formidable peaks.

And speaking of which, metaphoric peaks are still in the works as well.  But it's a bit slower going on those.  I'll just say for now that I'm still working at doing voice over for CNN whenever they'll throw it my way and I have plans to build up a reel with that material.  Occasionally, my voice coach will throw me an audition or two.  And as for my most recent music outlet, I'm jamming with two new friends now.  Collaborating for the first time in a very long time.

The only other bit of news I got as far as music goes is that I got a statement in the mail from Medianet, showing that The Life has been generating me royalties.  The number is so low, though, I'm not even gonna tell you how much so far.  But hey.  Gotta start somewhere.

Volcanoes and monkeys and a quick update...

The East River has ice floating in it and it's 2 degrees F, with a wind chill of -15.

I think it's time to get out of town.  They're threatening snow/ice/rain whatever in the forecast on Sunday when I'm supposed to fly so I'm a tiny bit nervous.  I don't think anything will get cancelled. Worst case scenario, I'm delayed and I miss my connecting flight and the airline puts me on the next flight and I just have to call my hotel and have them send the cab driver a little later in the afternoon and maybe it's a tiny bit later when I finally touch down at my hotel in Granada, where it's likely going to be somewhere in the neighborhood of 90 degrees F.

It's going to be fine. I'm so excited about this trip, as long as I can get there some time on Sunday I'll be happy.  This is the first time I've done anything like this.  Completely solo (as in, traveling solo, not meeting anyone when I get there, no one dictating what I do or when), very little Spanish under my belt (just enough to get by), everything planned to a T.   I'm going to have a blast.  I'm hiking volcanoes and learning to surf and exploring ancient petroglyphs and visiting coffee plantations.   And hammocks.  Lots of hammock time.  Maybe a massage...of course a massage!  Horses. Sea Turtles.  I'm going to see some freaking monkeys if it kills me.

So, yeah, despite all that excitement, I admit. There is a little nervousness.  But it's abating for the most part.  I mean, I've prepared for a lot here.  I even bought Skype credits in case I have to call someone while I'm there (I'm trying not to use minutes there at all because Verizon charges $2.89 a minute in Nicaragua while Skype is only 23.5 cents).  If I'm worried about my Spanish not being sufficient, a lot of people will speak English (hotel staff, ex-pats, etc.), I have Google translate, Duolingo, even a Learn Spanish in 7 days book saved in my Kindle app.  Puedo escribir en español right now if I really wanted to.

Before I run off to Nica land for a spell, though, I really wanted to drop in and update on what's been going on in the music/voice over/TV world.

The commercial I wrote music for?  It won that competition so now I'm going to get royalties when it starts airing on the web in UAE, Egypt, Lebanon, Kuwait and Saudi Arabia in March.  Awesome, right?

The new voice over demo is in the hands of one agent and one casting director so far.  The casting director I met at Marla's voice over class just the other night, an old school guy who likes to listen to all of his submissions on his car CD player (necessitating a scramble to find my old CD labels and a case I could put the disc in).  The agent is a co worker's agent over at Access talent (a place that was on my list of places to submit to anyway, so when he offered to pass my demo along, I said, "hell yes!") When I return I will submit to about ten more.

And lastly, I have an interview at CNN today for a full time position.  Please wish me luck.

For now, that is all.  I will most likely update again after I touch down in Nica.  Expect some video this time around.  I'm going to be peering into an active volcano in a few days. You're gonna wanna see that.

Happenings...

January's been a good month so far.  Filled with things.  Happenings.  Memories made. Events attended. Adventures had.  Sure, I've worked my ass off in the interest of saving for this trip of mine next month but the social gatherings and shenanigans in between have made it all worthwhile. Impromptu concerts, bar nights, a date here and there and always yoga. I tried a new gluten free beer at a meetup, made new friends there and at the yoga studio, hitting up regular classes.  I seem to wind up at Rockwood or Barbes on the regular still.

At home, I got talked into taking in not one but two kittens, mischievous balls of fur which are vastly changing my routine around the apartment (always closing my bedroom door and making sure not to leave anything breakable on the table). There's of course been some excitement with the career(s), a new demo, the chance at getting in front of some agents and casting directors and with the screening for "The Life" looming, I get called to do a commercial for the same director.

In the midst of working on the music for this commercial, we get slammed by a blizzard and I have to spend a night in the city at a hotel so I can make it to work two hours earlier than normal this morning, forcing me to take a slight hiatus from working on it.  But tomorrow I dive back in, hopefully having caught up on my sleep tonight.

I got a look at the first cut just now which was shot and edited this weekend.  I composed the initial idea this past weekend (landed on it after just two takes) after having only read the treatment.  A fun way to work, no doubt.  I like doing it this way sometimes.  I get to come up with some idea based on the raw emotions instead of immediately being preoccupied with making it fit some time constraint.  But now, my work is to extend the musical idea and work on creating an arc that aligns with the images I'm seeing in the video.

Really looking forward to this process.  The deadline is approaching.  For now, though, I'm going to head home and get that much needed sleep, without which I cannot function.

2015 things...

It's 2015 and I'm doing things.  I've got a really good feeling about this year.  I wanted to wait until a few more things seemed certain before popping my head up and checking in here.  But I feel like talking about at least this:



I finally got around to updating this with the new coach I've been working with.  Two of my old spots are on there and then four more that my coach wrote for me.  We managed to wipe out recording them in under an hour as well, which makes me happy because it's going to be cheaper than I had thought.  And the engineer at Gramercy Post turned it around super quick too so I managed to get it posted up online the next day.  All in all, I was pretty pleased with the process.  Now, Marla and I are going to sit down this week and talk about getting it out to some agents she knows.  So excited for that.

And on top of that, the pilot episode of "The Life" will be screened next month and meanwhile the director has hired me to write music for a light-hearted commercial he's been tasked with directing for a competition.  Some piano tune that I'm currently zeroing in on.  So, I've got music work and potential voice over work and something else on the horizon of which I won't speak just yet.  ;)

And then, in a few weeks, I'm going back to Nicaragua, on my own, for my first solo trip ever.  And by solo, I mean, I'm traveling there alone, staying there alone, exploring alone.  I've been boning up on what little Spanish I know, using an app called Duolingo, talking with my co workers who have been and have even set up meeting a co worker's friends on Ometepe.  I have all my hotels and cab rides booked (I will not be riding any public transportation in the country) and I've got plans to hike several volcanoes.  Pictures and video will ensue.  It's going to be an adventure.  A great adventure and I'm going to have lots of stories.  I cannot wait.

That's where I'll leave it for now.  Every year, I do the whole New Year's Resolution/Where was I last year post, but I feel like waiting on that just a little.  I have things I want to do this year differently than last year but whether or not I'll be able to sort of hinges on that thing that's on the horizon that I won't mention yet until it's certain.  Suffice it to say that I did a lot of things career-wise last year and the year before that worked and I'm going to keep doing them.  And all of that workout more, drink less stuff will be in there too.

I might even blog more but we'll see.

A hiatus is not the end...

A hiatus is not the end.  A hiatus is not me just throwing in the towel for a while and maybe I'll get back to it.  A hiatus does not even mean it's a matter of time before I give it all up and find myself a respectable job and just keep my guitars around to remind myself I once aspired to be a professional musician.  Yes, occasionally, I have to remind myself of this.  When things seem like they're getting away from me. When I feel like all of my other responsibilities are taking over.  When I wonder when the next job will come my way.  When I wonder, if I could just be managing my time better, whether I could find the time to release an album, or submit some more tracks to the licensing agency...or even secure myself a decent job scoring an indie feature.

I'd love to be one of those composers who teaches and has time to compose things, release albums, play shows and book paying gigs back to back.  Who licenses his music for commercials and videos, who generally gets paid on a consistent basis and doesn't have to work a day job that sucks his time and his soul away.  Yes, those kinds of composers exist.  Maybe I don't know any of them except in passing, the stray informational interviews I've done over the years, meeting someone at a party or connecting through a friend.  Most of us, though, do tons of other things in addition, and just because my "other thing" is somewhat unrelated to music, it doesn't mean that if I have to focus on the other thing for a while, that the music is going to slip away from me.

I really do worry that it will though and that's why I have to remind myself.  Remind myself that I didn't just come up here to succumb to doing the sensible thing for the sake of comfort and stability.  Remind myself that the day job is important but that the aspirations are important too.

I needed to write tonight, guys.  It's been a while since I've submitted anything and watching the frequency of these blogs become less and less has troubled me a little.  I want to have spectacular news to talk about all the time but then, my tendency is toward cautious optimism these days.  When I do have things to report about the trials and conquests of being an aspiring film composer/voice over artist in New York City, I find that I want more to not jinx them than I do to share them necessarily.  

But more than anything I want to share these thoughts I'm having tonight.  That this hiatus feels particularly harrowing because I'm finding myself really needing to do something musical while I'm kind of also having to job hunt a little. My extra freelance work that I'd been depending on has dried up so that I'm subsisting on just the one job now.

I need that outlet though, the music.  I've started to practice piano again for my own personal enrichment, even written a few things and put them on SoundCloud and may have a chance to perform at some yoga classes soon. I am finding more time to submit voice over auditions and my new coach has shown that she has enough faith in me to submit me for voice over auditions that she's privy to during our lessons.  But booking the job is the hardest part there.  The new coach and I are working quite well together though and I'm feeling a lot more confident.  I should probably lean on that for a while and just accept that the music gigs will come.  And the harder I work at the voice over right now while I have this good coach in front of me, the more that's bound to pay off (literally).

I'd really much rather that I had the time to go and seek composing gigs out instead of waiting for one to come around.  But even that has to wait.  I've told myself that this is just temporary and that I will get back to it once day job land stabilizes a bit.  I mean, I have a financial plan now.  I'm a big boy and I pay my bills on time.  In another life I would have loved to have lived a Bohemian lifestyle in the East Village, scraping together rent money month by month, and doing nothing but playing music, but that's not as easy as it sounds from my current standpoint.

I can't imagine giving up the music altogether just for that level of comfort that everybody craves sometimes.  I meet people up here all the time that gave up acting or whatever monumental endeavor they came here for and they tell me they're happy not being part of the rat race anymore.  Whenever someone has to tell me they're happy though...I just wonder if they really are, or even if they really wanted it all that bad to begin with.  But I try not to judge.  Everyone has their path, their limits and maybe they are happier.  But you have to participate in a rat race just about everywhere you go, any industry, any job.  And if you just slide into a comfortable position at a job you have to pretend to like, and try to coast through the rest of your years until retirement, than what are you even doing?  I don't want that to be me.  I've told myself that even if I never make it to where the bulk of my income is from music gigs, I'm always going to be doing what I love.  I'll make sure of that.

The process...

It's good to have goals.  It's great to achieve them sometimes.  But sometimes, it's just amazing to still be trying.  I say this as I sit discouraged in one of the areas I've applied myself while simultaneously more confident than I've ever been in another.  Voice Over felt like it had a strong start this year but none of the audition invites I've had in the past few weeks have turned into anything.  In fact, the only one that got close was cancelled.  Music, on the other hand, has shown some early promise and despite the odds of any of the opportunities I'm presented with really going well, it just feels really invigorating to be writing again.  Creating for a change instead of waiting for things I've put out there to garner me attention. 

This is when I feel most in my element, making something and, in the moment, not caring what happens with it beyond what the director or producer is going to think. That time when my mind hasn't gotten to the point where I'm wondering if the end product will be seen by the right people.  I'm just in my head creating.  I just want to see it get done the same way I can't stand to look at a pile of dishes unwashed in the sink.  I see a project that needs doing and I just go at it until it's done.  The challenge of figuring out the best way to accomplish it, strategically navigating the obstacles of each music cue, the intricacies of the plot and the structure of each scene, that eureka moment when I try something and it works.  All of it is what I live for. 

There was a moment when George and I were going over some of my cues and we decided to try taking two elements from two separate cues from earlier in the episode and melding them together to really highlight a certain change in this one scene.  Unanimous positive reaction and high fives all around.  My mind just buzzing with delight at the accomplishment in the moment.  See?  Why in the hell would I want to do something else besides exactly this? 

I wrapped up the seven cues for the pilot episode (down from a potential ten), just this evening and I'm not even technically done.  This screening on Friday in Boston at the Harvard School of Public Health is a preliminary test screening of sorts and the episode itself still has some phases to go through before we actually premiere it.  A few changes to the edit and pretty much all of the sound design still remain to be tackled.  The idea was for me to get some music on this thing so that it wasn't so rough around the edges when we screen it for the first time.  We lucked out, in fact, that George and I had a good week of nightly meetings since our shifts at NY1 overlap by a half hour.  So we were able to hash things out real time.  Which is a great experience and certainly tops batting emails back and forth and waiting for the other party to reply.

So, anyway, the work there is done for a while but, depending on the degree to which this thing changes and how much the sound design effects my own mix, I will be doing a fair bit more work but the bulk of it is done.  The cues are written, timed, recorded for the most part (though I may re record because, let's face it, I'm a perfectionist), and time codes have been meticulously laid out for start times and all that. But it's an understatement to say that I can't wait for this thing to come to fruition.  We're all hoping it'll open up some doors for us.  But again, regardless, I live for this process so I'm trying not to get up in my head about all that. 

I have another potential job that just came up tonight writing a bumper for a friend, this, in addition to the feature length that I might be doing.  Knowing that I potentially have more work in the future is a huge boost right now.   

Now, I can't even let it get me down that voice over success has not been the same.  The two have progressed at their own rate all along and I've obviously been composing longer than doing voice over.   I choose to take away this from this past two months: I'm still getting attention for my voice and the reasons I didn't get those jobs (besides that one being cancelled) is more likely to do with the clients just wanting a different sound than it is anything to do with my read itself.  Even if it was, that's why I have a voice coach, to whom I'm taking my audio files and those scripts in a week.  In other words, not sitting on my ass and whining about another failure.  I see failure as an opportunity to find out what I did wrong and improve.   No other way. 

With that said, it's late, as it always is when I'm writing, and I should finish this amazing gluten free beer and get ready for another day.  Good night!

Productive...

Nothing like a productive Monday to put me in the mood for a late night glass of wine.  This Rioja I picked up a few weeks ago...pretty damned good.  And why not?  I got so much done in a day.  Started off with a quick breakfast of fried over easy and toast and out the door early to drop some clothes off at Goodwill in Downtown Brooklyn, then off to the best yoga class I've had in a while with the inimitable Holly Ramey.  Something about deep twists and creative sequences and just the right amount of balance poses and add to that my frame of mind and a nice sit before class, I was on cloud nine.  Perfect way to start up the day.  Got to catch up with a yoga friend on my way out the door and then I was off.  Cooked lunch at home and then sat down and proceeded to write three more cues for "The Life" to add to the one I started yesterday.  Got to work on time, emailed the director and producer the spotting notes and the cues thus far and finished out my shift at NY1.

Now I'm back and still wide awake.  My co worker at NY1 says to me this evening, "I don't know how you find the time."  I don't either.  But the fact that I do find the time, gives me a great deal of faith that we'll be able to get some music put together before this thing gets screened in Boston in two weeks.  I'm going to have to clear my schedule just a little bit but we should be fine.  I think, since we're all in agreement that the edit still needs some work, that we're not even going to try to get this thing perfect before this first screening but they did ask me, since we have time, to put together at least a few music cues.  I went ahead and spotted the whole thing, like I said the other day, and now I wait to see what we'll focus on actually covering.  It's exciting.  The main title sequence is in the works now too, so I'm getting to see what that's going to look like with my music.  The director was nice enough to have my credit for "Original music by" come on screen right when the song goes into the guitar solo.  Epic.

So, fit to burst with excitement in just getting to work again but also not getting too far ahead of myself.  It is nice to envision the finish line every once in a while but you gotta keep running to get there.

On another note, had a great time this weekend and saw two great shows on top of going to a yoga workshop with two of my friends from the Nicaragua trip on Saturday (good to see them again but the workshop was crowded).  After the workshop though, I was off to Four Tet at Terminal 5 on Saturday night (epic set), at which I made a new friend, a musician from Cleveland who had won tickets and came to the city on a whim (with no second person to take his second ticket), and then Stephane Wrembel at Barbés on Sunday night (yet again, never gets old) for which I tried to get said new friend to join me but, being new to the city and not knowing the trains, he wound up in Queens by accident and resigned himself to heading back to the AirBnB where he was staying. But then I made more friends at Barbés just hanging out by myself, almost all of them musicians themselves.  One of whom plays in an awesome French fusion reggae band here in the city called DecaDence. They're pretty frickin' awesome. 

All around, times are good these days.  And I'm heading into the long week with a good feeling...which is a lot better than most Mondays.  So, onward and upward. 

Shock to the system...

In 5 days I'll be on a flight to a foreign country with some mosquito spray, sunscreen, summer clothes and a yoga mat.  I've been getting myself psyched by reading weather reports for Nicaragua and wondering how much of a shock to my system a 75 degree difference in temperature will be.  No, it's not even that it's going to be all that hot in Nicarague (mid 80s for highs, mid 60s for lows...all. week. long).  If you're reading this and you're in the U.S. right now, there's a good chance you already know how cold it is in most parts of the country.  This cold snap has been at the forefront of conversation and news reporting for the better part of a week and, while it is annoying that some people still have to be told that weather is not climate and that a single cold weather event does not negate global climate change, I'm more focused on just getting through it for the prize awaiting me at the end.  And since I obviously don't need my summer clothes at the moment, I took the liberty of starting to pack a suitcase with them. I seriously cannot wait.

As of today, I know a few more facts about this trip, as per a recent email from the organizers:  there are 8 people coming on the trip, myself included, minus the two teachers; only one of them is a guy besides myself; and we're all going to be on the same flight from Miami to Managua.  Tomorrow morning, I'm going to the 9:30 yoga class with one of the teachers who's leading the retreat, so maybe I'll meet some of the others then.

When I get back home tomorrow, I have until 2:30 to sort out a handful of other things related to the trip; calling the banks to let them know I'll be using my bank card in another country, calling the airline to make sure things like my gluten free in-flight meal for the return trip are sorted out, and various other errands. I really haven't thought of much else this week besides that...and organizing my iTunes library now that I have an iPhone.  That was a surprise...8 refurbished phones in a row that all went south on me and Verizon finally offers me an early upgrade (almost didn't approve it after the fact too, which pissed me off).  I have a few other gadgets related to said iPhone coming in the mail and I'm hoping they'll show up before I have to leave on Sunday.  One of them is a much needed case, another is a solar powered battery pack.  Perfect for the trip...but not terribly necessary.

I swear, planning a trip is one of my favorite parts of traveling.   Learning about a new place, finding out what's to do and see there.  The anticipation building until the day you leave, the slight nervousness that you'll forget something or oversleep the day of your flight.   All of this has reawakened a sense of adventure in me that I'd almost forgotten I had.  Sure, moving to New York was adventurous...but this is a whole different kind of adventure.

So, yeah, not much else is going on except the excitement of the Nicaragua trip until tonight when I got an email with the newest cut of the full length trailer for "The Life."  It's looking good so far and I'm psyched to hit the ground running when the episode is finally ready for scoring.  Not sure how long that'll be but I know that if this round of edits of the trailer passes with everyone on the production team, then the editor will move on to cutting and re-cutting the episode.

As much as I'm going to enjoy this trip, it will be nice to get back into a routine in a few weeks and really start working.  As previously stated, I've not really bothered to get back to work since the start of the new year.  I've made a few to do lists and done some heavy thinking about my approach but purposefully gave myself a break between my holiday travel and this trip so that I could really focus when I got back.  And so I could really truly relax next week.  I've had to actually reassure myself multiple times that it's okay to take a break.  I'm still trying not to think about how long it's been since I've submitted a voice over audition.

But there'll come a time for all that, when I get back here to the city, refreshed, slightly more tan, having deepened my yoga practice and cleared my head with a week full of meditative quiescence.   For now, I sleep...and dream of tropical weather while the wind howls outside my apartment.

Reflection delayed...

Barreling towards the end of the year and finally finding time to reflect.  It's been a fun trip to NC this time around and I have one last night before I pack up and head back.  And once I'm back, it's not too long before I'm gonna be heading to Nicaragua.  14 days.  So, naturally I'm far to excited and nervous about that to really think too much about things like freelance work.  And even though my plan was to sit down and take a look at the upcoming year's goals during my stay here, I didn't really accomplish any of that.

So naturally I have a lot of things on my mind with regard to that.  I spoke once before about not stressing too much about trying to find work but rather just being ready when the next opportunity comes along.  Now, I kinda think that I should really be finding a balance between these two extremes.  I can look for work and spend time between jobs making sure I'm ready when an opportunity presents itself.  Sitting around and waiting doesn't sound like a good strategy no matter what you're doing.  I would rather be proactive and identify things that I can be doing to help myself out between jobs.  Working on tracks that I can license, writing music for the guitar looping project, trying to find a space and time to rehearse/jam with the drummer (this has not happened yet this year)...also, working on revamping the voice over demos and the marketing plan.  So there's a lot to do there.  A lot to keep me busy.

But I'd really like to talk about goals.  And not just goals for the sake of goals but targeted goals that take into account how over ambitious I was last year with some goals and how on point I was with others.  Which goals did I accomplish and which goals did I fall short of accomplishing?  Which ones did I neglect entirely?

There's a real pressure not to just do what I did last year, even if some of my moves were successful.  So I find myself sitting here reading old blogs and reflecting, as I do.  Another thing that has crossed my mind is that in order to focus on some things, I may have to leave a few things by the wayside.  I can't even wrap my brain around all that right now.  So, I think my first focus in the new year is going to be contacting producers, both voice over and film, to touch base and maybe scare up some work.  That's the big thing that I still don't have a lot of under my belt.  Work.  I mean, my website looks good, if I do say so myself, but I feel like it can never hurt to have more current material on showcase.   I could have had two feature film projects last year but both of them slipped through my fingers.  Not that I'm remorseful for that.  It was a great experience and it taught me that getting heard of is only part of getting the job.  You gotta be on your game and stand out from the crowd.   Which is a tad frustrating because it feels like it's out of your hands to some extent.  You can only do so much.  I mean, really, let's look at this: you can put together a stellar reel but you have to sort of pay attention to what other composers are doing and find ways to stand out from them with your work.  And you can have your hands in a lot of things, to get the attention of a lot of different kinds of producers for a lot of different kinds of projects, but then can you really be stellar at any one thing if you're spreading yourself so thin?  But then do you have to really choose just one area, be it electronic music, orchestral music, or pop?

All this floods my mind when I start to think about this.  And then I start to think about the licensing agency and how they haven't heard anything new from me in months.  The good thing is, there was one last piece of music that I never sent to them because I never finished it.  I liked so many aspects of it but it was missing something and I never really put my finger on it.  I revisited it a few days back and I think I have some ideas.  I may want to try some things I was afraid to before and get some restructuring underway.  I have ideas occurring to me out of the blue that I'm not sure why I didn't have before.  It's a good feeling, at the very least, to have a project I can get started on now without waiting for some job to come along.

Anyway, voice over is a whole different beast these days.  I haven't had a job since the summer.  By comparison this year has been a lot more meager.  But I did get my first out of the blue calls for work this year along with the attention of an agent...never mind the fact that she told me I sounded too regional on one of my spots and to watch for that.  I'm not too bummed about either because for one thing, that agent was way too hard to get a hold of for someone I'd like to be working with to find voice over work.  And for another thing, my lack of work in this arena can probably be directly attributed to me filling up my schedule with freelance TV work.  CNN and TruTV were great boons to my financial well being this year and are solely responsible for almost doubling my salary for the greater part of the year and finally, this trip to Nicaragua.

I think it's important, in the midst of all this stuff to remember that I worked hard this year and now I'm going to go and reward myself.  I need this.  Too much work and no play, make Tim something something...

So, I think instead of stressing over all of the above, I'm going to focus on the Nicaragua trip and then get started on all of it when I get back.  I think I'll leave New Year's Resolutions and game plans for the New Year untouched for a few weeks until I come back from Nicaragua with a tan and hopefully no tropical diseases.  At that point, I'll touch base...I may even send pics from the beach.  So stay tuned...

Working Composer...

I get paid to compose music.  If I could say that to my 23 year old self he probably wouldn't have believed it.  Or he would have been psyched to hear that his efforts would eventually pay off.

Still a little surreal though.  It's a good feeling.  But I know to be proud of my accomplishments and at the same time, not in utter disbelief.  I have, after all, been hard at work for the past 10 years and, to some degree, I was always confident that I would achieve some level of success.  Hopeful yet realistic, I never found myself getting ahead of myself with my expectations.  I always knew it would be hard work; that I would need to overcome many challenges and that it wouldn't happen overnight.  Any musings about Oscars acceptance speeches were exercises in pure imagination, meant mainly as pep talks to keep me going and not as a realistic goal in themselves.  

I'm still floored at the realization that I am, in fact, what one might call a working composer.  With three simultaneous projects, all with different deadlines and all for different types of projects, I'm feeling more creatively stimulated than I have in quite a while.

Just this week things started to move forward with two out of the three.  The bumper for the .org, and the song collaboration with Amanda Brecker for the end credits for "The Life" have both moved on to the next stage.  The bumper is almost done and the rest of the team likes what I've done so far.  I'm in a holding pattern while they talk final stages and decide if they need any further revisions.

Amanda and I are talking about getting together next week to hash out the structure of the song and talk instrumentation, etc. and possibly do a scratch recording.  We will likely eventually record the song with a friend of hers who has a pro tools set up.  Meanwhile, I will take some time this week to come up with more ideas and solidify the ones I've been playing around with.

For the piano theme for the short film, I'll be writing a lengthier version for the end credits in addition to the shorter opening theme.  I have some time to work on that so I've been taking a bit of a break from it. I want to get started again pretty soon though I haven't found enough time to sit back down at the piano and write a contrasting section.  After my trip to NC, I worked 17 days straight and had my first day off yesterday, a day which I used to catch up with friends.

I began notating the piece just so I can have it in front of me when I record it.  I like using the software to expand a song idea but my general feeling about composing almost anything is that I want to be able to write it all while at the piano and then bring the ideas to my laptop to notate and flesh out the ideas into something coherent.  Never writing solely on the computer.  That way what I write will be more organic and playable.  I was met with this dilemma a few times in grad school, especially when composing for instruments I did not play myself.  It was too easy to compose in a vacuum with the computer software and then get to a rehearsal and find that the instrumentalists couldn't play (or had trouble playing) what I had written.  Beyond that though, when composed away from the instrument, the music often sounds not as honest, perhaps even contrived.  It doesn't have that certain something.

Anyway, so far I've been lucky that the deadlines for all these projects have been pretty flexible.  Plus, I've found myself between revisions on one or more when feedback comes in on another such that I've never felt too taxed throughout the process of working on them all and have never had to work on more than one at a time.  Now, while I wait for the next round of feedback on the bumper, I can be working on ideas for the song Amanda and I are writing together and at some point, I can casually revisit the piano theme.  Compartmentalization.

The cool thing is, the experience of juggling all of these projects on top of the full time and freelance jobs gives me a sense of how I would manage multiple projects (potentially more than I have on my plate right now) were I just composing and doing nothing else.  Can't wait for such a time to come.

That's all I got for now.  I'm insanely tired because I stayed up far too late last night.  Now, it's back to work.

Doldrums...

Yes, it's summer.  Yes, there's a heat wave.  Let's get that out of the way.  I've been so exhausted I barely have any energy left to rant about how it's just now occurring to me, after having a ceiling fan installed in my living room, that the A/C unit we have is just not powerful enough to cool this apartment.  It reads what I think, or must assume is, ambient temperature and currently it says 89 degrees.  It feels slightly cooler than outside in here so I don't understand where it's reading that temperature.  I round up and that says 90 to me.  At this point, I really can't even have a sheet on me in my bed because it's so so hot in my room.  The situation is that the A/C can only be plugged into one outlet due to the old wiring in the apartment.  One breaker is wired just for the room where the A/C unit is and the other breaker is for everything else.  We found this out over a year ago the first time we tried to toast and microwave at the same time and I had to tumble down 4 flights of stairs to the basement to trip our breakers.

So, that's where I'm at as I come back from Manhattan at 2 in the morning and start thinking about trying to sleep in this.  I know it happens every year but it just sucks.  And I know I'll feel different when we hit that week where the temperature drops to the teens in January but we've got autumn between that and this so I'm not thinking about that right now.  I am thinking about another A/C unit with a higher BTU than our current.  And the great music I just saw tonight at Rockwood.  Mieka Pauley again.  I think I'm in love...or something like it. 

But, that's not what I want to talk about tonight.  I'm finally writing again.  For a film that the director I worked with last year just sprung on me.  At the moment all I'm doing is developing a theme for the main character in a quirky dark comedy with nothing to go on but the script and a few youtube links with music he'd like it to sound like.  I'm struggling with something though. Often, as a film composer, or a composer in general, I get asked to compose something that sounds like [insert style, genre, specific song here].  My question is always "how do I do that and still be original?"  Don't get me wrong.  I can emulate with the best of them.  Comes from having experience singing, piano-ing and guitar-ing in a very wide range of styles and having a freaking masters degree in music composition.  But some days I just want to write what I want to write and have the director say "yes, that!  Keep that shit coming! More of that Tim Daoust signature shit!" Instead of having them say, "can you make it sound like [insert style, genre, specific song here]?"  

It makes we wanna shake them and say, "let me do my freaking job for Chrissake!"  But I know that would be unprofessional and that I should really center myself and ask, the question I just posited in the last paragraph: "how do I do that and still be original?"  I know I can do it.  I did it here with the help of the inimitable Crystal Bright on the accordion.  A director wanted accordion music à la the Amélie Soundtrack for his production reel so I picked this song to sort of model it after.  And I think I did pretty well plus I put my own rock edge into it (listen around 1:28).  So, now I need to figure out how to do something along these lines for the current project.  And it hit me the other day, that yeah, I can do this so stop being such a sour puss about it.  It's a challenge in its own rite and if I put myself in the right mindset, it could certainly be a worthy one.  I don't always have to be working on a project where I'm doing exactly what I want to be doing. After all, this is all work for hire stuff.  Of course, to some extent, I'm going to have to bow to the desires of whomever I'm working for.  And it may be years before I meet a director who likes my stuff and seeks me out for it instead of just liking working with me and knowing I can emulate what they want.

It does sort of bring me down sometimes though.  I get to thinking, "am I ever going to get to where I'm writing film music that's highly personal and unique to me if I keep writing for people who just want it to sound like their favorite music?"  I'm sure every film composer in the history of film composers have asked this question, on down to John Williams himself (sorry, I just went with one of the most recognizable film composers there).  I'm sure he had to compose a bunch of stuff that wasn't unique to him first before composing the stuff he's known for and, in fact, probably sought out for.  Or did he?  I'll have to ask him sometime.

Anyway, it's late and I'm rambling and I wish I lived alone so I could sit down at the piano right now.  As it stands, it'll be a few days before I can do so again.  So much work, plus Lacy and I are gearing up for the great city of Philadelphia next week.  More on that later.  Good night kids!

Performing vs Composing...

Am I becoming more of a performer than a composer?  Is that a good thing? And am I becoming a different kind of composer in that I'm composing different genres of music now than what I was composing years ago?

Okay, weird questions, but they've been cropping up every once in a while and I thought I'd address it tonight because, in a rare moment of solitude and relative tranquility, I actually have the time to stay up late blogging without worrying about getting enough sleep.  Tomorrow (Sunday, which is today because it's taken me this long to finish this blog), I literally have nothing planned except an afternoon yoga class I may not even attend because I tweaked my wrist a few days ago and it's not exactly easy to do things like plank pose and hand stand or any arm balances for that matter.

So, to hell with going to bed.  Lately, I've been thinking about not getting to compose enough  of my own stuff and how it's affecting me.  Not only that, but I've also been thinking about what I've been composing now versus what I've been composing over the last few years.  My enthusiasm is waning for some types and all but gone for others while I'm becoming much more enthusiastic about still others.  I remember a time when I first moved here and I was still fresh out of academia imagining that I would be writing chamber pieces and symphonies and having them performed and blah blah blah.  Those things never really crystallized and somewhere along the line I sort of abandoned the contemporary music scene.  I started to realize (shortly after my last premiere with Tania) that I was tired of spending so much time composing and rehearsing something that would be performed maybe only a handful of times and be seen/heard by a only a few people and which I might get a good recording out of that I could throw on my reel.  Beyond that even, I wanted something that I could relate to as well and that would have some kind of staying power.  Something maybe that I was performing myself. 

And then, on top of that, I wasn't even sure I was connecting with the music I was trying to write.  In a way, it just stood as sort of an exercise, like grad school itself, to learn how to compose, arrange, rehearse an ensemble and put on a concert.  I started to realize, however, that this stuff I was writing was false.  It wasn't organic.  To some extent, it was even a stretch that I was writing it.  And I mean mostly the particular genre: contemporary academic art music.  Something about the audience, the venues and the ultimate end product just doesn't speak to me anymore.  And I'm not sure it was ever my scene. 

What really hit me is that part of what was wrong is that in a lot of these cases I wasn't the one performing.  It's not music I would necessarily perform on the instruments I can play and the genres in which I started out performing, i.e. rock music (guitar) and classical music (piano).  Okay, so with this song I sang in the bass section when it was performed and with this piece I sampled Tania's piano playing and performed the electronics live.  But ultimately, I'm writing these pieces for instruments I don't play and trying to get other people to realize them and hence it doesn't come across as organic to me.  It doesn't always turn out like you want it.

It's funny because it reminds me of back when I played in rock music and I first found my motivation to start composing my own music and stop collaborating with band members in a one for all, all for one kind of approach to song writing.  I was tired of having to bow to other people's desires about how a song should turn out so I wanted to write my own stuff but now I realize that composing ensemble pieces, even where I'm the sole composer, represents its own challenges.  Challenges I've no doubt learned a considerable amount from, but challenges nonetheless.  That was really a sidebar though.

What I'm getting at is that in the last few years, I've started to accept that the music I write really ought to be a lot more personal.  That's a lot of what this journey has been about.  Some of the best work I've done, meaning that which I'm most happy with, have been works where I played every instrument, recorded, produced and mastered everything.  But that's not to say that I haven't had some wonderful collaborations.  Working with Murat Keyder on this one was one of my favorite experiences since I moved here.  And working on the score to Sword in the Shadow with the amazing Japanese flute player, James Schlefer, was great experience.  

But what's more personal than Tim Daoust writing rock and electronic music?  Things like this song that I wrote over 10 years ago.  And this song that I also wrote almost 10 years ago that I recently revamped.

Granted, none of this is to say I won't ever write for the contemporary concert hall again.  I may someday.  But right now I want to revisit that side of me and performing again with Lacy has made me remember how much I enjoy performing in popular genres versus academic esoterica that nobody gets but I swear people pretend to like just to seem worldly and educated.

Lucky thing is that the music for my next project, the finished pilot episode of "The Life" is so guitar driven that it comes extremely easy to me.  Once I zeroed in on what George wanted for the underscore and the main title theme, everything fell together.  And I'm really happy with what we've done so far.

More than that, I'm happy in general now that I've come full circle, gotten the experience in composing orchestral music and working with exotic instruments and come right back around to composing the music that I enjoy but with a dusting of influence from everything I've touched on along the way.  Mind you, this doesn't mean that every score I do is necessarily going to be guitar based, but it does mean that the stuff I write for myself is going to be a lot more focused on guitar and electronics and is not going to bow to the standards of academia that I felt were boxing me in so much.

Of course, now the thing is finding the time to finish the songs I've started.  And when will I perform them?  Stay tuned.  I really need to sleep now because tonight, the night after I started this blog, I still need to get up early the next day.  My last regular day at CNN for a while.  I'll be starting at TruTV on Tuesday.  Wish me luck! 

Back in Action...

Back in action now that I'm back in the Apple.  Over the course of a very relaxing few days off, filled with many visits, a few bike rides, some much needed floating in the pool, wine, food, more wine and pollen (unfortunately), I was able to polish off the three voice over demos.  Now I have them and my film scoring reel locked and loaded and ready to go.  For the next few months, though, I'm going to be working nonstop at two, perhaps three jobs, to make a mound of money before diving back into projects. 

As I put it to a certain close friend and musical partner, this is a rare opportunity to get a leg up.  I have two freelance jobs in addition to NY1 now: CNN and TruTv.  Both of them came out of the blue but were much needed and welcomed.  TruTV hired me back in February but, with the bizarre lag in HR operations, it took them until now to pull me in for training and, in that interim period, I got a call back from the very manager at CNN who had passed my resume to TruTV, asking if I could help out in the media department at CNN while one of their staff goes on maternity leave.  I started back at CNN at the beginning of this month and now that I'm done training, will be working doubles, mornings at CNN and nights at NY1 three, maybe four nights a week. Luckily, I still will have the weekends off.  TruTV promises occasional work on top of all that when any of their staff goes on vacation. 

So, my plate is full, and though I probably won't get much done in the way of music and voice over work, I do have my arsenal of demos fully polished and up to date so, what's to say, I can't push forward on finding a voice over agent and scoring that next scoring gig? 

Before I dive into all of the above, I do have my birthday celebration tomorrow night to kick it all off.  The last weekend of my vacation before diving head first into what could be the busiest two to three months I've experienced in New York City yet.  But I'm open to what's ahead. In fact, I'm quite excited about it.  Anything could happen.  My feet are in the doors.  I'll just leave it at that.     

Birthday celebration should be a fun time.  I have a night in the East Village planned tomorrow and am really looking forward to seeing people and eating some good gluten free food and drinking in one of my favorite bars. 

I think it's a really good thing that I took this vacation at this particular point.  It wasn't really timed on purpose or anything but I really needed a few days to wrap my brain around the next few weeks and how I'm going to manage it all.  My schedule changed a NY1 a few weeks ago and I had just gotten the hang of it.  But with all the extra work and everything, prioritizing became really hard all of a sudden and I even almost melted down and freaked out a few days ago when I first landed back in NYC.  I knew that it was important for me to take this opportunity for more work and more money but I was worried about not having time for music and voice over.  But I think what helped was realizing that the voice over and music careers are both at a point where I can put them on hold for a bit, or at least feel okay devoting a little less time to them.  I've hit several milestones in the last few months and am poised for some big moves in the next few months but I don't necessarily need to act on them right now.  Plus, Lacy and I should have no problem finding time for shows and rehearsals as I'm still off on weekends (without that I don't know what I'd do). 

The only thing I'm slightly bummed about is having less time for yoga.  But I think I can manage to do some breathing exercises at work and still pull off yoga classes on Saturday and Sunday.  And if it gets a little crazy, without the yoga and the sleep, I can always forfeit a few of the shifts I've signed on for at CNN as long as I give them advance notice.  So the next few weeks begins my run of double shifts and then I'll reevaluate.  For now, it's good night and tomorrow = fun. 

Here are some pics from my vacation in Raleigh.

Shows...

It's the weekend and I'm off work.  Yes, I know.  I've mentioned that.  But leaving work last night knowing that I was off for the whole weekend, I breathed this huge sigh of relief.  And knowing that I was headed out to see a show, I was able to shrug off what felt like a cold coming on and power through, running on pure adrenaline and excitement.

The show was a band called Minor Arcana, two of the members being guys that played with us in Philly.  The venue, The Acheron, was in deepest darkest East Williamsburg at a little hole called The Acheron.  The front of it was a bar and the venue was separated so Lacy and I, not knowing that the venue had a bar too, got two drinks and stood there, realizing that we couldn't bring the glasses in the venue.  While standing there finishing our drinks, I took in the scene, assuming that the loud hardcore punk rock was being pumped in from the opening band playing next door inside the venue.  So, I was expecting the same style from this band and overall the venue was seeming far more punk rock that it actually is. When we finally went in there though, I realized there wasn't even anyone playing yet and Minor Arcana was setting up.  I went and said hi to the guys (Ross, I had seen outside already) and ordered another drink. 

The band started not long after and I was blown away by their sound.  They have two guitars, a bassist, drummer, singing keyboardist and another backup vocalist who played chimes, percussion and keys.  The stage was not all that big either.  They were very prog rock with multiple time signature and tempo changes during the songs, the first one of which was an instrumental.  Or at least had a very long instrumental intro.  Ross and Tony who played with us in Philly (Tony also in NYC), are very talented musicians but the rest of the band blew me away and they were all pretty tight as well. 

Though, I was increasingly tired and didn't even think I should be out, I was eating it up listening to the sound waves pounding around in there and it baffles me to think sometimes how incredible it is, not only that beings like us evolved out of the soup over millions of years to become the kind of creatures that can make sense of the way the air moves around a room influenced by the striking and plucking of things called instruments, but that we can manipulate that plucking and striking into something so amazingly beautiful that you just stop and forget everything for a minute but what you're hearing, what you're brain is interpreting into something that to someone without the benefit of working ear drums is basically just air molecules bouncing off each other in patterns that he or she may or may not feel.   Pretty incredible. 

And I don't recall if I mentioned this or not but one of my New Year's Resolutions this year, one that I'm absolutely killing, is to go to more shows.  If I include dance, open mics and shows I've played in in that, the number is up to something like 20.  Told ya.  Killin' it.  Some of those were our own open mics where I saw some amazing musicians, some were shows I caught part of at Barbes.  I included the four shows Lacy and I have played (including today's show at National Underground and last week's showcase) and a dance festival I went to as well as a few friends' bands and last nights show in Williamsburg.  Oh and I just upped the number to 20 before I finish this blog because I forgot about a random show I happened upon at Spike Hill one night a few weeks ago.    

As for today's show at National Underground, it went fairly well and we had an okay turnout considering the snow and how short notice it was that we found out we were playing.  We will have another one at this showcase on the 27th of April as well.  I will be reminding you. :)

For now, I am at home finally just taking it easy.  Because my body is telling me that I haven't been doing enough of that lately.  And it feels good to just slow down too.  I have spent the last few months (probably more than that), thinking I'm not doing enough when in actual fact I've been doing far too much.  Haha!  I mean, I got 10 voice over gigs in as many months, two film scores back to back last year, and scored a licensing contract with a company that licenses music for film and TV.  And on top of that, I just landed not one but two freelance TV gigs on top of NY1.  I'm going to be glad I took it easy this weekend in a few weeks when I start I'm sure.  Thankfully, I have a vacation coming up in April around my birthday. 

Anyway, I should rest up some more.  More excitement ahead!

A Sea Change...

At the end of my work week here and I'm trying to accept that it's not all productivity and milestones.  But then I'm also constantly trying to remind myself, when I'm sitting here idle, at a slow moment in the work evening, that I did accomplish a lot earlier today (voice over auditions and work on re-editing one of my demos...oh, and rock star yoga class at noon before work) and that it's no big deal, as awful as it feels, that I'm getting nothing else done today.   It's just too distracting right now at work and so many of the things I have to do, I need to be in the home office/studio to be doing them.

I'm on at least 5 major tasks right now that are preoccupying my time:
Working on the remix project which is due Feburary 8th
Submitting VO auditions on an almost daily basis if I can
Rehearsing for the upcoming CD release parties with Lacy
Networking with filmmakers to try and get another film scoring job
Revamping some of my voice over demos and creating a promo demo so I can ultimately start soliciting agents

...and I think that's it...maybe I can count trying to clean up my apartment on a grand scale.  Right now I'm on the donating clothes leg of that race.

So, you see, very few of these things can be done at work.  I guess I can be researching filmmakers and writing emails right now but everything else needs to be done at home.  I'm in a phase with the remix contest where I really can't be doing anything in headphones.  I need my monitors.  I could be doing research on agents, too, I guess.  

But all this comes with the sinking feeling that, with a potential change in my work schedule here, I may have fewer chances to get any of my work done during the day unless I adjust my routines.  I've always been good at that though.  A while back, I lost the overnight shifts, sorry, got rid of the overnight shifts and while it is nice to be rid of them, I did get a staggering amount of work done there.  During the weekdays here it gets far too busy for me to have my laptop out and, lately, I haven't even been getting breaks because of how short staffed we are.  Having more seniority when we finally get our new hires in here, I stand to completely lose all weekend and late evening shifts, which would be nice...I mean it'd be effing great!  but the notion of doing any kind of work other than administrative stuff, and sending emails would be all but gone.  Maybe I could get away with the occasional mixing and editing of music tracks on my break, or voicing auditions in edit bays, something I haven't done in a while.

Ultimately, depending on what my new shift is, I'm going to have to figure out when during the day I can do things like submit to VO auditions and compose and mix audio.  Shutting the door to my room works but sometimes it's still too distracting when Katrina and I are home at the same time, which could happen, say, if I get a 10am - 6pm shift.  Don't get me wrong it be a rock star shift and I'd eat it up.  Imagine!  Being able to get off work at dinner time and go home and cook dinner and eat it right away instead of this shit where I make three portions of the same meal and carry it all to work, risk spilling it in my bag (happened yesterday with chicken soup), then have to microwave it later so that the vast majority of dinners I eat have been reheated.   Imagine, getting up at the same time every day and going to yoga at the same time and then having weekends off so I can hang out with people who have 9-5 Monday through Friday jobs.  I've been on horrible dates that were my weekend night but the other person's middle of the week or vice versa (worse in my opinion).

But I digress.  This blog is about my own productivity.  I see it as a challenge that, with all the things that could potentially change with my schedule, I may have to do my freelance work at less optimal times of day.  So far, I've actually enjoyed and actively benefited from working nights.  I wake up fresh, go to yoga, then come home and work my face off and then go to work my night job feeling accomplished and in a good mood, get off work, maybe have one drink and sleep and do it all over again.

I suppose I'm getting a tiny bit wistful but, ya know, one door closes another opens, yadda yadda.  I guess I'm going to post this blog and then get to doing my research.  Later on!

 

Setbacks...

Well, I've determined, mostly beyond a shadow of a doubt, that my airport wireless card on my Macbook is fried.  I finally had a chance to reinstall the OS today since I had the genius idea the other night to backup the data on my Macbook on my PC.  The PC has a pretty big hard drive and the network proved to be the best way to transfer files.  I just left it going for a few hours and when I woke up this morning it was all safe on the PC. 

Reinstalling the OS did not help my situation however.  Now, there isn't even a message saying no airport card installed.  The wireless icon doesn't even appear on the information bar at the top of the screen.  So, that's that and I've made an appointment at the Apple Store on 14th Street for tomorrow afternoon. 

I really can't wait to have this situation taken care of.  It's hopefully going to be just a minor setback when all's said and done.  A minor setback that actually gave me some good perspective.  I've been trying to do too much lately.  Knowing that I would have less time to work in the next few days to weeks with my Macbook not fully functioning, I had to reexamine what was necessary to do right now and what could wait. 

The PSA music, the tracks I'm working on for the licensing agency...I was trying to push forward on these but I coudln't make any progress spending most of my free time trying to diagnose what was getting to be a bigger and bigger problem.  I wanted to finish the PSA within the week and also be able to submit as many as 20 tracks for licensing (when I really only have about 5 fully ready). by the end of November.  Neither of these things is going to happen now.   But knowing I couldn't possibly manage that made me reconsider what was absolutely necessary to do.  The deadline for the PSA is far off and I probably don't need to submit so much music for the initial offering to the agency. 

In fact, thinking about that number made me realize that not only is it not likely to be necessary to submit so much, submitting fewer pieces and not trying to make them so complex is going to pretty much guarantee a higher quality output. 

In the meantime, until I'm back up, what can I focus on now?  Voice Over.  I do that on my PC almost exclusively.  I only ever use the Macbook for it if I'm here at work and there's a job I absolutely have to audition for.  And that's rare.  So, unhindered there, I submitted to about 7 more auditions this week.  I've been highly selective but also I've been direct invited to two auditions by the same producer.  I'm not entirely sure what that means but perhaps it's a good thing. 

In addition, I've had a friend send off my demo to her agent and also followed up with an email.  I plan to call on Monday.  So, that's exciting, too.

Another thing I can focus on now, while my Macbook gets fixed tomorrow, is the excitement of potentially performing live with Lacy soon.   I know we'll be doing an open mic this Wednesday perhaps but now that she's officially a Brooklynite, we're talking about shows for November.  Updates on that shall ensue.

For now, I'm going to get back to the Walking Dead marathon on AMC.   

Inversions...

Been thinking a lot lately about my inversion practices in yoga class and how they relate to my life as a whole. The headstand, the hand stand, forearm stand, tripod handstand...I always feel like I'm right at the point where I could leave the support of having the wall behind me when I kick up and actually practice them in the middle of the room.  But then I start to settle in to the safety of the wall as a support and a backup and I'll spend months not advancing at all with any one particular pose.  For example, I may have gotten to where I can balance for a few seconds in a handstand but, without the wall there behind me, I can't come up without risking toppling over on my way up. In headstand I've grasped and put into practice the concept of using my core strength to lift myself up versus using momentum from kicking up but lately, though I can get up, I haven't been able to stay up for very long for fear of, once again, toppling over. Either way, with any of the poses, I always hit a wall. And I don't advance until I sit back and examine what I need to do to get to the next level.

As with music and voice over, I feel as though I get to one point and can't get any further until I fully examine the nature of my obstacles.  Regrouping and examining my methods and their results is key at these points.

Having this insight from yoga is great, too, because I can apply what that practice teaches me across the board.  Which is this:  I find that, in yoga class, and lately, especially with headstand, it's most effective for me to not feel bad if I have to come out of the pose for fear of losing my balance.  I just allow myself to make several attempts at it before accepting that I've tried hard enough for today, no matter how far I've gotten.  I also avoid looking around the room at the damn yogi rock stars that are up and balancing the whole time.  It's not about competition.  Even if the voice over and music stuff can be at times, it's still helpful to import this line of thinking into that arena.  After all, I have to acknowledge with both that I can only do so much and that there are only so many hours in a day.  The important thing is that I try and I'm not idle.  If I try something and it doesn't work, I keep going and I try the next thing. And when I've had enough: rest in child's pose. 

That having been said, I am definitely making strides with both but there's never an uninterrupted stream of progress.  I must always contend with obstacles.  Trying not to let this discourage me is the trick. 

And the amazing thing is that, with both areas of my life, I will often pass a milestone in a very noticeable way.  That feeling of weightlessness when you can balance in handstand even for a second equates with that amazing feeling when someone hears my music or my voice and likes what they hear enough to hire me and I realize that the hard work has paid off to some degree.  It's that "hey, wait.  Maybe I can do this."  feeling that's so amazing.  And it really does feel like, despite all of the slips and falls and awkward landings, I can balance, at least a little.

So I should keep it going, right?  I started this blog sitting at Barbès and typing on my phone while listening to Slavic Soul Party.  It's a Tuesday night which means it's my Friday and I wanted to cut loose a little so I headed over there after dinner with my girlfriend in the Village.  Work at NY1 has been hectic and I'm really feeling the weight of all the balls I have up in the air right now (At the moment, I'm looking for legal help with the contract from the licensing agency and have several emails out to talent agents and production companies with my voice over demos attached.) and occasionally, it gets a little frustrating waiting for them to land.  Though, I'm happy right now that I have lots of work, even if not the paid kind, just yet.  I'm finishing a ton of pieces to send off to this licensing agency once I finish looking over the contract and am satisfied.  I'm doing some pro bono work for a friend who was helping produce a short PSA and needs music.  I'm also auditioning for voice over stuff on an almost daily basis.  On top of it all, I got a little bit of a nice pay off from all the hard work I've already done this year when a director I worked with sent me a link to the finished film that I scored.  I'm a little unsure about posting it just yet because it was a password protected link but PM me if you wish to hear/see it.  It's a 13 minute Sci-fi short titled, "The Feed."  You may have heard me talk about it a good bit back in April, May and June if you read this blog at all. 

Now, I'm afraid it's time for me to go to sleep for a change.  Wish me luck with all of the above, headstands and handstands notwithstanding. 

Waiting...

I've been revisiting old tunes I haven't listened to in a while today, just in general.  This morning, I opened up a playlist I forgot I had made of songs I listened to back on the post high school Europe trip in '99.  Then, I just shuffled through all songs on my phone at random, turning up songs from the 90's and other stuff I haven't listened to since the first year I was here and even as far back as high school days.  Right now, I'm listening to a playlist on my Windows Media Player called "Bittersweet."  A Regina Spektor tune is playing.

And the weather here is finally whispering of fall, after another upturn in the temperature and humidity since my last posting. Low humidity (most importantly) and a light breeze, highs in the low 80s.  I'll take it, I thought.  Literally, a day before the change came, I swore off the awesome hat I picked up at Brooklyn Industries the other day and long sleeves, just generally, cold though it may be in the building where I work.  But then I regretted it slightly, strolling down the street in a tee-shirt and jeans and a bare pate on a cool morning a few days ago. I love it, though, when the breeze rolls in and you can smell memories of the last year and you have to stop and breathe it in.   

Anyway, I promised I'd spout some more about the McKittrick Hotel's rooftop bar.  Last Tuesday night, Alexa and I got in our 1940's get up and, after a nice dinner in Chelsea, we headed over to the Gallow Green, a separate entrance from where one would go in to see Sleep No More.  A darkened elevator, operated by a man in period dress, took us up to the floor just below the roof and there we were met by a hint of that token intricate set design one comes to expect from Emursive and Punchdrunk.  When we emerged on the roof of the building we were seated and given menus with clever cocktails with names like "Damn Spot" and "Blonde in Peril," both references to Shakespeare and Hitchcock.

There were also people in character and a live band playing.  One woman came by to tell us how she lived at the McKittrick for many years and hinted at a special appearance by someone later in the evening.  We drank our fill of cocktails and I even had an absinthe shot but no one ever showed up and unfortunately the band stopped before we could get much dancing in.  The band was then replaced by a DJ with a Macbook which sort of destroyed the atmosphere a tiny bit.  I'd certainly go again sometime with a gang of folks post show perhaps because they also offer punch bowls that serve 2-4 people or more.  These I've heard involve some presentation as well.  Sounds fun and delightful!  Plus, I got the feeling there were many details in the set design and references to the show all about but I didn't get a chance to really look.  I'll have to go back. 

Anyhow, in the week since, I've been busy with voice over work and debating another coaching session.  And meanwhile, also waiting.  For responses from the current filmmaker and the prospects.  Even also waiting for payment from the last voice over gig. Seems like waiting is a theme lately.

But I can't help but feel I'm on the verge of something all the time.  Hence, it's a pretty exciting time right now.  Regardless of the outcome of all the various things I have floating up in the air right now, it's just good to know how much better I'm doing now than I was last year at this time.

With that said, it's time to (guess what) go to bed.  Tomorrow is my only day off this week. With the Republican National Convention going on in Tampa there's extra coverage and I was working overtime today...so naturally I'm exhausted.  Most of my shifts at NY1 take place when there's not a lot going on so being there during the week with massive amounts of stimulation is a bit of a change.  Makes me want to relish my one day off so much more.  So, good night for now.